Withholding Love

A four year old has very few ways to express their displeasure with an adult.  They might throw a temper tantrum, they might refuse to eat, but the big one, the thermonuclear option is to declare “I don’t love you.” This may work for a four year old, but as big people we really want…

I’m In Control Here!

Yes, you are in control of your life.  You call the shots, you directly control all aspects of your life.  Good for you! Suddenly we realize that rather than being in control of our lives we are really doing nothing more than moving with the tides around us.  This can come about from several directions:…

The Blame Game

Until we accept personal responsibility for our own actions, words, desire and thoughts we have but one tool in our tool chest to allow us to move forward: Blame. We blame others for the state of our lives, we blame others for the condition of our marriages.  “You ruined my (our) life, you cost me…

Save Yourself

A huge percentage of the American population has been on a commercial airline flight.  One of the early instructions is always, “if you are traveling with a child or disabled person, place the air mask on yourself first, then assist the other person.  This is not an example of “lifeboat ethics”, it is a statement…

I am in a relationship

Today’s reality is that we right click on pre-selected categories:  single, married, separated, and the ever popular, “it’s complicated.” We have allowed ourselves to be defined by what are simply generalities, when in truth we, each of us, you and I, are far from generalities.  Do you understand that you and I, through the very…

The Power of Touching

Study after study has shown that babies who are touched and held, especially those babies who are premature, thrive far more successfully than babies who do not get the power of human touch.  Yet as we move into our aging process we are taught to NOT touch each other.  There are inappropriate ways to touch…