One of the first things we must come to realize as we step into an In-powered world and experience, is that we can no longer blame anyone else for our actions, our choices, our thoughts. As a result, we can not longer blame the boss, our parents, spouse, friends or the dog for our not achieving or experiencing what we say we want. As an In-powered individual we recognize there will be times when things don’t go the way we think they should (see blog on failure), and there will be times when everything goes perfectly, even better than perfectly. Both are the result of our involvement. If they didn’t go as planned, let’s find another way, if they did, can we recreate that process to use again?
When we blame someone else because we blurted out words which were less than loving, what we are saying is that we have no control over our mouths. Do we want to live with that? Can we justify that statement? I think not. When we mess up, the most In-powering possibility is to admit we did it. There may indeed be consequences, but as we were told as children, “if you lie, the punishment will be worse”.
Every one of our choices will probably not be right and perfect. When we accept this about ourselves, then and only then may we extend this realization to others. When we get to the point we can accept a good faith effort free from malice about others, we have a place to work, to grow, to forgive. Until then the best we have is to declare: “mistakes have been made, blame will be placed, people will be fired.” A great motto for a t-shirt, not so wonderful in our daily lives.